Reading At the John

Can't let go of your news reports? Get the Restroom Reader, which will print out incoming news stories from sites you have registered for directly into your toilet paper! You don't have to worry about reading your wife's beauty tips-site news because the device can tell who you are by your weight as you sit on the toilet. Of course, you might then be a different person at the beginning and at the end of your 'session'. Through The Adventures of Teapot the Cat.