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Friday, July 08, 2005

Tips on how to lead a healthy insane life

I am not one to throw crap around (read: stupid chain mail) , but I discovered this at work and couldn't stop laughing. It has been proven by countless schoolchildren that you laugh the hardest when you are least supposed to be laughing, and the same applies to reading this while at work.

20 Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level Of Insanity:
1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on and point Hair Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do something, Ask If They Want Fries with That.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It "In."
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone has Gotten Over their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For Smuggling Diamonds."
7. Finish All Your sentences with "In Accordance With The Prophecy."
8. Don't use any punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Order a diet water whenever you go out to eat with a serious face.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To Go."
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play Tropical Sounds All Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend Their Party because you're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Co-workers Address You By Your Wrestling Name, Rock Bottom.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I Won!"
18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking lot, Yelling "Run for Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The Economy, We Are Going To have To let One Of You Go."
20. And The Final Way To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity.......
share this with people. I hope it helps them discover their inner strenght.

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